Dear Daughter,
The Lord gave you to me 15 years ago in yet another sign of His innate goodness and never-ending love. I could not have known then what kind of young woman you would become. That your hair would be blonde and lovely and your eyes blue were as much a mystery as your passionate and strong-willed personality. Ok, I maybe could have guessed about the passionate and strong-willed bit – you come by that honestly.
In a way, we grew up together. Me figuring out the shades of gray between black and white while you learned to walk, talk and ride a bike. And I guess that’s one of the things I want to tell you, first child of mine – that you will always be becoming. You will never arrive until you meet Jesus face to face. So instead of trying too hard to figure it all out, and making yourself slightly crazy in the process – trust that you are walking with the author of it all, and He’s constantly pruning and refining to make you more perfect. Read John 15 and I Peter 1 to remind yourself always that the pruning and refining are necessary and good. Because they can also hurt like hell.
But abide in Him. Remain in Him. Let Jesus heal you. Let the Spirit help you. Let the Father hold you. And you will become whole and holy.
In our family we’ve been talking a lot about sanctification. If you listen too much to the culture around you, you might start to question even using this Christian language. Use it. Learn it. But always remember who you’re conversing with and what their frame of reference is. Seek to understand people who think and speak and act very differently from you. Mostly seek to love them.
It’s the people closest to you who Jesus will use to sanctify you. Your family. Your brothers. Your dad and me. We’ll do things or say things that frustrate you, that hurt you, that annoy you. In those moments you have a choice. You can listen to the enemy or you can listen to the Spirit in you. Choose the Spirit. Over and over again. Allow those uncomfortable, difficult interactions to help you bear more fruit from the Spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control.
All of this talk of holiness can feel heavy, but there is so much joy in walking with Jesus. The abundant life He offers is truly that – abundant – overflowing with gifts. Learn to recognize them in your life and name them each day. Even now, look for the ways He has gifted you.
I adore seeing your creativity whether it’s in music or writing. You make me laugh with your wit and humor. You are diligent, a thoughtful friend and a deep thinker. Use your gifts and talents. Cultivate them. Trust that God has a plan and purpose for your life, and rather than chasing after that plan, chase after God. Seek Him. Make prayer a habit and a haven. He promises when you seek Him, you will find Him. When you draw near to Him, He draws near to you. Make that your first priority each and every day. And then walk with your God. The God who is the God of your mother and father and their parents before them. Taste and see that He is good.
This has been the pattern of my own life. If I had followed my own plan, you probably wouldn’t be here! I wouldn’t have gone to UT, married your dad, quit my job or moved to California. Life is funny, and I’m always thankful God’s way is better than my own.
If you’re going to hear the Spirit’s voice, you have to be quiet sometimes. Get off the computer. Shut down the phone. Be ok being alone. Oh, and close the book. It’s so easy to fill your head with a thousand other voices and distractions. Along with responsibility, those will only multiply as you get older. Practice it now.
Enjoy today. Savor right now. Don’t worry about tomorrow, but keep your eyes on eternity. It sounds contradictory, but you’ll find the more you focus on forever, the more you’ll know the next right thing today.
More than anything, remember that you are loved. So, so deeply loved. Whatever happens. Or doesn’t happen. Whatever you do. Or don’t do. Whatever you say. Or don’t say. You can always come home. We will both keep growing together.
Love, Mom
#rhythmwriting2021